Kicking and Screaming


 

2016 has had a consistent undertone for me. That is, I have resisted every change, opportunity, loss, beginning and end of situations, and attempted to avoid everything consisting of anything uncomfortable or different than what I have done in the past. You may say “What? You are resistant to change and discomfort?”….Ummm YES!! In fact, most people are! There are some people who love and crave change. I simply happen to not be one of those people who actually accept change as easily. In fact, I have been known to be a bit of a brat (ok, a big brat) when change is impossed upon me.

 

I must admit however, that this year has taught me so much about this unattractive quality. Yet, every bit of change I resisted was actually a blessing. Every bit of pain I have felt, and pain I have caused was actually an opportunity in the making. My bonds have become stronger, my career has become something I joyously embrace and absolutely adore (in fact I have decided to further my education and training within my career, and I have even developed a hunger for expanding my knowledge in my field). I have had some great experiences traveling on my own and meeting with people I would have never met in my life from another country.

 

I noticed that what surfaced the most this year were the bonds and connections I feel to others. My admiration for people’s ability to love has grown to be true adoration for them. I have never known someone to love as freely, or as deeply, and forgive as quickly as some of these beautiful human beings in my life. I have also learned to let go of those who do not know what it is like to be a friend, and have embraced tightly on to those who have shown consistently what true friendship looks like.

 

I have taken the time to welcome new people into my life, even if I have made it hard for them to be in it. I find that sometimes the people, the things, and the situations we resist the most, are actually those opportunities which shape our destiny. I also think that sometimes it is simply hard to believe that we deserve someone’s love or forgiveness and we can sabotage a friendship or relationship so easily. The key here for me was having people around who were willing to be honest and direct. And how lucky was I that people also made it a point to let me know how important it was for them to build on our friendship, love and trust. Most people would have simply walked away.

 

2016 may have been the year I have thrown tantrums like a child would have if she didn’t get to keep playing in the playground past daylight. Regardless of my resistance though; the Universe has brought me some pretty exceptional souls and life energies, that I would do anything to ensure they know how deeply I love them. This holiday season is going by so quickly, probably quicker than most other years, it seems. So if I can take a moment to slow down and count my blessings; to spend even a few minutes a day to let everyone know how much I appreciate them, and how dumb it was of me to kick and scream like a brat not getting her way. Then maybe this passing time will have some mercy upon a brat like me, and allow me to love them all up, to hold them close, to thank them for their patience, to show them how special they are, and how I couldn’t possibly have gotten through this year without them all.

 

I truly hope from the deepest side of my soul, that you can and will; let everyone know what they mean to you. I hope that even if you didn’t support a loved ones’ cause, or didn’t buy from their fundraiser, or didn’t go to their birthday party this year; that your bonds are solid and that all parties know they are important beyond the surface stuff. Enjoy this season and embrace the love and friendships and simply get over yourself. Stop being a brat and let go of the grudges, because what matters is love. Life is too darn short to hold on to the punishments we put on ourselves or others. I bet you anything it really isn’t that serious. But the loss of someone great is, and you can’t repair that by holding on to being righteous. I wish you all love and light and above that, that you are able to experience true Love and Light within your soul. It feels much better in that space, so seek it out.

 

Cinthia