The Game of Falling in Love

 

You know? I have learned many games in my 42 years of life. Yes, I believe I’ve had a good life so far. Like so many others I have had my ups and downs, heartbreaks and heart mends. I have struggled as much as I have had successes. I have had accomplishments and some undeniably painful and even embarrassing failures. I have played games and I have been played with. Of all those things however, I think; the game of life and falling in love is the one game that we should all be so very lucky to have a chance to play.

 

So of course, I was looking at this game as a player in it. I realize that my favorite part in the game of falling in love is that there are so many ways to do it. I have seen people fall in love so wholeheartedly that it consumes them. I have also seen people love so deeply that it hurts. I have seen people love at a distance or simply out of admiration. I have seen people fall in love with inanimate objects. BUT, the most beautiful of all is to see people fall in love with each other. I can also tell you that I have played many of those parts, if not all.

 

I had this discussion with a friend the other day and how it was a gift to play the game of falling in love. I remember meeting and seeing this person as a perfect stranger. I sat next to them without giving it another thought. I had never intended to ever feel anything for them, nor did I assume that they would have a significant role in molding me into who I have become. I can tell you that this has happened several times in my life. Some of my closest and dearest friends hold a piece of my heart because we have fallen in love with each other. I can’t, actually; I refuse to imagine how my life would be without them. Even when I don’t see my friends often. I still hold their love close to my heart. It is hard for me to let people go, it always has been. In fact, I can admire someone who can walk away and never look back, but I can assure you that has been a struggle for me.

 

I have been called “love monkey” for some reason. The most fantastic of all reasons is because I can certainly act like a monkey jumping from branch to branch. I can love up on all those around me and some may see it as silly monkey business. I simply want to play and connect and let people know they are loved. I am extremely grateful for those who have shared the art of falling in love with me. Sometimes, I can even go backwards and remember the exact moment I fell in love friends, with my children, or with my parents, or even with my brothers. I can also tell you, that there are those moments I can pinpoint with each stranger who became my friend, and when they entered my heart and I handed it right over to them. And I am a stronger person for it.

 

The great thing about falling in love with those around us, even our co-workers or the friendly cashier at the coffee shop, or even the people who have become part of our very soul is that; they will always be part of that wonderful game we played. This game is where we agree to give each other of our love, and where they give it back lovingly because we feel safe. I am a better person for having fallen in love with my soul sisters and with my soul brothers, because they fulfill the need for peace in my heart. You can’t ever leave my personal tribe without knowing that while you are in my space I will love you deeply, and when you are away I will still love you deeply. I am always so thankful to be given the opportunity to love a person because it was a gift.

 

I must warn you though. The game of falling in love isn’t always easy to play. Sometimes loving with complete abandon can leave us vulnerable and as an easy target. Sometimes you can be so wounded that you refuse to play again. Sometimes it feels like the scariest and most unsafe place to be when it begins to become too raw. But even with this warning, I can only share my personal experience, and my experience has been that every game has left me stronger, wiser, maybe even sort of a love junkie. Because feeling every feeling in it makes me human, it reminds me I’m alive and that the best thing I can give and receive is love. I am forever thankful for those I have shared this game with. Especially for those who have chosen to stay in it with me even through the tough times. I honestly wish for you many players who are willing to play this game with you. And above that, I hope that the universe will provide you with many versions of this game and that in each one of those games you get to play with partners who will play the never ending game with you. May you fall in love over and over and over again, but promise me you will truly fall in love and let others fall in love with you, we all deserve that much honesty.

 

In love and light,

 

Cinthia